A time to...

(I have no idea why this is posting in all capitals, and I have no idea how to change it...so frustrating!)

I have wondered why I'm not as sad as I think I should be. From the way that people interact with me, I feel that I should be in the depths of depair. But I'm not.

In fact, I'm enjoying my life right now. Part of me thinks I should feel wrong about feeling this way, but the Lord brought to mind Matthew 9:14-15, "Then the disciples of John came to him, saying, “Why do we and the Pharisees fast, but your disciples do not fast?” 15 And Jesus said to them, “Can the wedding guests mourn as long as the bridegroom is with them? The days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast."

It is a time of laughter and dancing in our home now as we enjoy Zach and all he brings to our family. I don't want to be sad now. In a way I feel that this wouldn't be fair to Zach to begin to mourn while he is still with us.

Of course, I have those moments (usually alone in bed) when I really let my mind go to what life might be like after he is gone, but that is definitely not the norm. I know that the weeping and mourning will come, but that time is not now. I don't want to miss any moment with Zach because I was wrapped up in my own emotions. Lord, help me treasure every moment.

Ecclesiastes chapter 3 in the Bible says,

"A time to weep, and a time to laugh;

a time to mourn, and a time to dance"